Rating: 3.8

Country: USA

Release Date: 2005

Track list:
1. Scalped
2. Stimulation in A Rigormortified Whore
3. Jackhammer Headcrush
4. Asexual Virgin Killer
5. Gouging Out Eyes of Mutilated Infants
6. Explosion of a Thick, Orange, Pourage like Substance
7. Inexplicable Scrotal Mutilation
8. Ripped With Anal Forceps

Total Playing Time: 32:30

Band Website: Artery Eruption

Artery Eruption- Gouging Out Eyes of Mutilated Infants

Brian Mohler - Guitars/Insane Gutturalspewage
Grant Mohler - Bass/Advanced Cricketmaster
Darren Williams - Drums

Sales Pitch: Artery Eruption is a 3 piece band out of California who has busted out their second slab of raw vinyl called 'Gouging Out Eyes of Mutilated Infants'. They have a sound that inspires contrasts to such notable members of the Brutal Death Metal genre as Brodequin, Devourment, and Prophecy. This is a mandatory addition to any fans collection if you're into guttural American brutality. Fuck, Artery Eruption's new album is better than a nice warm golden shower from oh so sweet Jessica Alba.

Stark Reality: Artery Eruption is similar to getting a blow job from a scabby crack-whore then downing a plastic bottle of Heavenly Hill vodka in a forlorn attempt at hammering away the shame. What Artery Eruption has done with 'Gouging Out Eyes of Mutilated Infants' is create an underachieving sophomore effort. The album is pertinacious enough that I wished at various intervals I had either a .357 Magnum to shoot my disc player or that hallmark of Californian Glam Metal, L.A Guns, whose album 'Cocked & Loaded' compelled me to at least laugh.

Right from the start I get the impression that Artery Eruption combined too many poor stoner epiphanies into one album. Songs 1, 3, 5, 6, 7, and 8 incorporate a variance of the same structure. Either it starts out with mid-paced blasting then torpidly moves into a main slow slam riff or it starts out in the opposite of that description and gets faster. Either way Brian's guitar seems to vibrate in a perfunctory chug, chug, chug as if Godzilla got loaded with King Kong on quality weed and Anchor Steam beer then started stomping on Tokyo. Grant's bass stolidly follows the lead but is somehow corpulent enough that I can see it thud against my woofer. Really the riffage ain't that bad, but then average ain't that good. The style is similar to the sound captured on their first album 'Reduced to a Limbless Sex Slave' blended with the groove of Devourment and song structures of Repudilation or Pustulated on their album 'Pathognomonic Purulency'. They even have a steamed out locomotive sound quality and approach that is similar to Dyscrasia. Each song is made for head banging and slamming with a bass driven production that is dirty enough to stay brutal but definitely clearer than their debut album. It is monotonous but not to the point of leaving me in a slack jawed drooling stupor of malaise infested boredom. Shit, where I at an Artery Eruption show I'd strap on my retard helmet and hit the pit with flagrant fists in search of fan girls sporting At the Gates, Cradle of Suck, or Trivium tee-shirts. Then reality would slap my balls and I'd wonder what I was doing at an Artery Eruption gig.

What holds the music together thereby keeping the guitars and bass from being completely vapid is the fustigating drum work of Darren. He sets the speed of his double bass at 8 and almost always holds that tempo from start to end even if the song nearly comes to a stop. Not unlike Chad Walls on Brodequin's 'Instruments of Torture', he kills every portion of the kit and adds heavy blast beats, but the double bass does not sound triggered. Darren ain't Gene Hoglan but he is listenable despite repetition. Other than the rambunctious drums, another solid part of this album is the eructating vocals of both Brian and Grant. Together they do a good job of providing a harmonious bullfrog and cricket discord. Each song has them bouncing vociferous vocals off each other and the instruments. I would not call them as sick as Andres from Pustulated or as intimidating as Ivan from Ancient Necropsy, but they are fetid enough to make a coroner drool.

One thing I dig about this album is the song "Asexual Virgin Killer". It quivers and shakes quicker than the rest of the tracks from start to finish reminding me of a discombobulated engine that has come to life. Yet, it has enough slams to make you want to watch porn with a puppy and a bottle of lube. It is too bad that there are not more songs on the album like this one to displace the monotony. Either that or the song was short enough to hold my attention.

Now, I admit to liking certain elements of this album but it's not enough for me to whoop around hollering with the slop happy intensity of a guy who caught hepatitis from Pamela Anderson. The reason is that 'Gouging Out Eyes of Mutilated Infants' as a whole comes across tired to my ears. Short of saying that Artery Eruption perform without passion I will offer that their play is lethargic. They do not submit anything new to the Brutal Death genre in comparison to better bands rooted in this slam style like Devourment, and Putrid Pile. Essentially this makes them a bit banal, but what they do offer is a solid change of pace. This means that if I was playing combinations of blistering genres of metal in my disc changer Artery Eruption might be in the mix out of $10 dollar obligation spent for the disc, but what I can not do is listen to this album from start to finish.

March 9th, 2006